Homesteading

It's a quiet medical week mostly. I'm hoping this will be the case for all of my off-chemo weeks. These should be my 'good days' in theory. Life without staple is more comfortable. I have a lovely new memory foam cushion that 'does a butt good' supplied by a terrific friend. Still can't find comfortable positions for sleep, but the awake hours are doing much better.

Yesterday I baked bread. It felt very good and right to be doing something so homey and sustaining. We needed bread for sandwiches and I provided it all on my own. Self-sufficiency. Something that has been in low supply lately. Something in which I used to be an expert. As I've mentioned before, I'm a wee bit too independent minded for my own good. It's hard for me to ask for help, especially for the merest mundane things. And most especially for the things that I love doing, like cooking and keeping house. So it is very pleasing to be in a place where I can comfortably accomplish some things on my own. And bread, it's basic in the best ways: nourishing, comforting, tasty. Of course, that completed and I had five more ideas of things I could do right now. But I stopped my spinning mind, breathed, and decided that it was enough. That's a bit of a breakthrough. It's hard going from sixty miles a minute to six. And six is a good speed right now. A month ago my speed was limited to more like a sixth. Progress, slow but steady. I'll take it.